 An open letter from a NYC nanny in response to the New York Post article on April 8th entitled ‘Escalades, Hampton homes, and much more: The rise of the diva nanny’. Maxene S. is a professional nanny of 12 years, an active leader in the nanny community, and is passionate about the career she has chosen! She has a degree in Culinary Arts and a Montessori Teaching Diploma (NAMC), with a specialized certification to teach 3 months-3 years. Check out her thoughts on the ‘diva nanny’ article and the issues surrounding the ‘nanny market’ in Manhattan. They say that being a parent is the hardest and most important job you will ever have. If so, shouldn't the person you hire to help you raise, educate, and LOVE your children also be held in high regard? Unfortunately this does not seem to be a commonly held view in busy New York City. Instead it seems that there are non-stop assaults on the nanny profession, taking what should be a very creditable career, and tarnishing it with stories of "bad eggs” in over sensationalized articles. The New York Post recently published one such article entitled, ‘The Rise of the Diva Nanny’, where the journalist paints the picture of the "hired help" acting entitled and spoiled. I shared this story on my Facebook group page, NYC Professional Nannies, where New York City's career nannies gather as a community to learn about child development, NY industry standards, and the laws that have been put in place to protect our vulnerable profession. Our group strives to stop the erroneous assumptions and stereotypes about our valuable role as a nanny. Reading the article's claims from these featured parents and lawyers about "diva nannies" all point to one sure thing: No professional career nanny would or should ever act this way. Our good nanny title is being misused and blemished by under qualified, unprofessional babysitters and those who choose to employ them. Calling a babysitter a nanny is like calling a first year medical student a doctor. These two titles are very different and should not be used interchangeably. Being a professional nanny is one of the most challenging, tiring, and emotionally draining careers you can have. Coming into someone's home to help them raise their most precious children is one of the most respectable and intimate vocation choices. We do not just play for a living… we do and are so much more! Many times, we are asked to fulfill a proxy-parent role and do everything needed in order for the child’s life to be healthy, smooth, and happy. In NYC, parents tend to have much higher standards and grander expectations in every aspect of their lives and that of their children. 24hr, weekend, and overnight nannies are a common place and career nannies typically work 50-70hrs+ a week. The cost of living in the New York Metro area is exorbitant! $15 an hour is close to the average payment in the city and most families pay illegally, don't offer benefits, or the required overtime wages. Sadly, it appears that parents value the cleanliness of their toilet far more than the quality of their children's caregiver as even housekeeper on the UES earn in the range of $25-30 per an hour. Those employers that say they can't afford to pay a good hourly rate to legally employ a qualified and professional nanny should not feel entitled to have one and should consider childcare alternatives such as daycares, au pairs or babysitters. A great number of professional nannies have college degrees or certifications (many in the education field) while others started out as babysitters and built a long resume of childcare experience, skills, and references that deserve to be compensated fairly. Why shouldn’t qualified nannies receive a six-figured salary, benefits, job perks for the important job they do? We nurse your child when sick, help with math homework, teach important life skills and stay late when you have that big charity benefit to attend.  Now don’t get me wrong, of course we notice if your one year old wears a cashmere coat that costs more than our weekly pay and how generous you are when you tip the caterers after a "little" dinner party. We feel hurt and unappreciated when we don't get a bonus, a raise, and a “thank you” for going above and beyond on a daily basis. And we do pay attention to those high salary and glamorous perks offered for other nanny positions just as any other career driven person would do. But at the end of the day, we will stay late, endure the hours, and job demands because we love and respect your children, family and our career. We won't make "diva like" stipulations because we are professional nannies, and we have a respectable reputation to uphold. To be a great nanny, you need to give a piece of your heart and soul to the children and the families you work for. There are many joys that come with the job but also so much frustration and tears. Daily you have to navigate a very fine and intimate line between being a friend/parent figure and keeping a professional employment relationship. Bottom line: Raising your children is a HUGE responsibility and we deserve to be respected and compensated accordingly. We love what we do for a living and find it an honor, privilege, and joy to do so. But please, please don’t confuse our amazing profession with the ‘divas’ or under qualified babysitters. Are you a nanny in NYC? We would love to hear your thoughts on this topic!
Are you an expectant or new parent in search of a professional nanny? Let Choice Parenting help you navigate the nanny hiring process and teach you how to find a quality nanny that matches your family's needs. Call or email to schedule a free consultation and learn more about our childcare coaching sessions.
21 Comments
newmamanyc
4/14/2015 02:41:41 am
I appreciate the response to that stupid article. Don't want a diva? Dont tolerate brats. Child care is important.
Alexis
4/15/2015 06:38:10 am
Thank you!! I was born and raised in manhattan and have nannied here for over 18 yrs! We deserve a lot more than we get. Thank You for recognizing this!
Janie
4/14/2015 02:55:12 am
this is a really defensive response. that nanny diva article was skewed, but this one is equally skewed. good for you if you have all these high qualifications but most nannies don't. and unlike becoming a doctor, there is no "certification" for becoming a nanny and it is not your perogative to decide who is a nanny and who is a baby sitter. Also just because we live in NYC doesn't mean we're floating in money- $15/hr is pretty respectable. Especially considering you're providing employment to a cadre of women who otherwise would be being paid much less and being employed under much worse conditions as illegals (which is what the vast majority of nannies are).
1. Yes there is a certification to become a childcare provider, along with other many certifications a nanny can have to ensure proper care of your child, like CPR , Sing language and Vegan Cooking. They may seem ridiculous but let's face it we live in a multicultural city, do you want your nanny debating what's gluten free during your children's lunch? Certainly not !
Lisa
4/14/2015 04:46:59 am
You are wrong. The INA offers a nanny certification.
Erin
4/15/2015 12:01:56 am
Hi Janie, I just have to say you have absolutely no knowledge of the professional Career Nanny world. What you just mentioned is so opposite of that world the author of this article is talking about.
Denny
4/15/2015 07:09:01 am
I don't live in NYC, but I am a nanny. I live in a much cheaper market, but I commute 30 miles so I can afford a decent home and work where there are nanny jobs. There are many nannies here who will work for $15/hr or less, but many make so much higher wage. There's no way I or the experienced nannies I know could afford to live in NYC making $15/hr. And none of the nannies I know are illegals.
Lia
4/14/2015 03:15:21 am
Janie, as was stated in the article- if one can't afford a nanny, there are other child care options in place. Respectfully, having a nanny is a luxury- not something all working parents are entitled to. It's private childcare, and like private school- you should expect to pay more. As for babysitters vs nannies: a babysitter is an occasional child care provider who may have many clients, many of which are one time date nights. A nanny is someone who is committed and usually contracted to a specific family full time every week or part time for one to three specific families every week. A nanny learns to function inside a very personal and private sphere while maintaining professional demeanors and meaningful longstanding loving relationships with the children in a nanny's care. Though you are correct, there are not required certifications to become a nanny, most families looking for a professional career nanny will set their own requirements including Bachelors degrees in teaching, child development, psychology, etc. These families also generally require maintaining CPR and 1st aid certification as well as years of experience before hiring, and fairly and legally compensating their career nanny.
Alexis
4/15/2015 06:41:50 am
Yes! ! Thank you Lia! I'm glad someone spoke about this atrocious article, as nannies we basically have a NDA agreement with the family , I believe no family would like to be tarnish on a newspaper about their abussive behaviors , so why it doesn't work both ways ? I've encounter that many times the line of respect only works one way.
Francine
4/14/2015 05:03:55 am
I pay $23/hr because I do believe extra degrees or qualifications command a higher rate. I greatly appreciate the care that goes into the job. BUT I have a major issue with the fact that this author (and others like her) will look at a child's clothes and feel they deserve so much more. It's that disgusting sense of entitlement that sickens me.
Kaice
4/14/2015 05:49:06 am
Francine, it is not entitlement at all! It is looking at a $700 designer coat that cold wears for 2 months and wondering how that coat is as important as the person taking care of that child. Our job is important. I personally have an education degree from a top school and I chose this career over teaching because I love the intimacy of it. But, that means I have loan debt I must pay. Parents can't have it all ways. They can't expect us to have advanced degrees, certifications and the like and not compensate us for our experience. If you want to pay minimum, you will get the minimum quality.
Francine
4/14/2015 03:27:42 pm
Kaice, no one is saying the coat is more important than childcare. Just as no one is saying water is not important even though it costs a $1 a gallon. I agree nannies need to be justly compensated (I mentioned we pay well over market.) We pay for the additional education and training you speak of. I'm just saying no one should pay more for quality water or healthcare or childcare because their children wear cashmere. A nanny should never feel entitled to an employers wealth like it's some unlimited money grab. We had paid a new nanny who had only been on the job for 3 months the full 2x weekly salary xmas bonus and got a very weak thank-you. She's no longer with us because this sense of entitlement pervaded into other areas. For one thing, she couldn't be bothered to pick up after herself and thought it was the maid's job. She also couldn't be bothered to keep our child's clothing clean with a bib and told our maid it was ok because I could just buy new clothes anyway. I feel very fortunate to have means right now but who knows what tomorrow brings? I was not raised to be wasteful so I was horrified. A segment of the nanny population has definitely lost touch with reality. These are the nannies who spend their days whining to each other that life is not fair and jump from job to job in a futile search for their winning lotto ticket. Let me let you in on a little secret...the best nannies keep their heads down and focus all their energy on the kids. They INSPIRE the goodwill and generosity of their employers.
Denny
4/15/2015 07:12:36 am
You sound like a great employer. I despise when people are wasteful - whether they can afford to be if not - and it sounds like you are respectful of your employees.
Alexis
4/15/2015 06:43:33 am
Yes!! Kaice, Thank you!
Hillary
4/14/2015 06:03:30 am
This letter responds well to the Diva article. Thank you. I believe both mothers and nannies primary purpose here is the best care for the child. Child require and deserve nurturing, age appropriate developmental help and social interaction with other children. As well as structure, good manners and behavioral skills. A good nanny provides this for a child. We all want children to grow up in a good environment. To obtain this for your child, I strongly urge Mums and Dads to be able to fit this into their budget so they can get the best care possible. As a trained, British nanny with 30 years experience in private homes, I spent the last 9 months searching for the best fit for me. A family that wanted the beat for their child. I could write a book on my experiences. Some quite shocking. I urge parents to make good, sound choices. In the city I always pay college girls $20 per hour for babysitting my charges. This is a fair amount and reasonable for NY. Also, it is only human for a nanny to be aghast when her child dresses in exorbitant priced clothes, but a family says it isn't in their budget to raise their salary. When I came to NY 30 years ago that generation of parents thought very carefully who they were leaving their children with. I am sad to say when I called the top agency in London placing British nannies worldwide, they told me America didn't have a demand for trained nannies anymore, the countries where we are a premium and well looked after are Russia and certain, safe, Arab countries. I am sad the industry has turned into mums who Google everything to get answers about raising their children.
Nuala Walsh
4/14/2015 01:02:56 pm
Wow. Going by this account, qualified nannies are for the rich and famous. There is no decent and affordable childcare in this city.
hillary
4/14/2015 03:40:57 pm
Hi Nuala,
Brittany
4/15/2015 05:37:13 am
I really appreciate this article. I am a professional nanny of 14 years in a large metro city and I agree with you 100%. Very well said! Thank you for taking the time to speak for the professionals in our industry. 10/7/2021 08:22:24 am
A nanny's job revolves around the concept of nurturing a child. Nurturing your child requires the ability to connect on a deep level, to develop a safe, caring relationship, and to provide a stable environment. A fantastic find is a nanny who is sensitive to your child's specific needs, plans an interesting day around his hobbies, and adjusts her caregiving style to fit his personality and temperament. Even better is someone who is determined to staying in a job for the long haul in order to provide that crucial continuity of care.
lucky
10/22/2021 10:32:22 pm
Thank you very much! Leave a Reply. |
Hi! I am Holly...For over a decade, my career focus has been centered in and around NYC in the childcare, education, and family support industries. 
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